The plan

(Picture is me at 266 lbs.)

So what have I done thus far...

A few years ago, I went to see a local wellness/nutrition coach, Results by Kim. Her combination of protein drinks, low carb/high protein diet in conjunction with exercise helped me to lose on average of 3-5 lbs. a week when I was on her plan. Unfortunately, two weeks after starting the plan, I was injured in a car accident and ended up in a walking boot for several months. I felt depressed and anxious, as I had just lost my business after they decided to quit filming movies here in Iowa, and also this was the winter where we'd received over 70 inches of snow in a matter of two months. We lived in a 2nd floor condo, and trying to drag two small children out several times a week just got to be too much, and I quit going.

After talking to my doctor about some other symptoms I was having, she had me tested for PCOS, and that came back with all results pointing to PCOS. Great. Another hurdle to try to get over while trying to lose weight. I started metformin, thinking it would help, but it only made me extremely ill.

A few weeks ago I made the decision to start seeing Kim again, knowing that this was the plan that worked for me (so long as I really stuck to it). One pattern in weight loss for me is that the only time I seem to lose weight is when I am pregnant. I have never ever technically gained any weight during pregnancy, because as soon as I find out I am pregnant, I end up losing about 20-25 pounds in the first couple of months and never get back above my pre-pregnancy weight. No, this is not due to morning sickness; I've never had it with any of my kids. Talking to my doctor and to Kim, we all agreed that a surge in the hormone HcG could be the key factor in getting over that hump of not losing.

putting our heads together, I've decided to use the HcG supplements in conjunction with Kim's plan. The full HcG plan includes "Loading" days where you fill up on as much fatty food as possible, then limit yourself to a 500-calorie a day diet. That's basically just starving yourself. And if you're going to be exercising on a regular basis, 500 calories a day is not going to be enough to sustain you. I'll be taking the supplement in conjunction with a plan that limits total carbs to 20g or less a day, most of which come from fruits and veggies, along with about 4-6g protein per meal, and 1 protein drink/snack 3x a day between meals. You also keep a food journal so that you can take it in with you to your weekly meeting to make sure you're staying on track.

I also signed the family back up at the local YMCA, and we started going today. Only spent 30 minutes on the treadmill, but it felt great. I have made the plan to go to cardio classes starting Monday morning 4 times a week, with 30 minutes on the treadmill after. I also have an appointment with a fitness coordinator on Tuesday evening to sit down together and develop a strength training plan. I also went online last night and joined LIVESTRONG.

After starting the plan last week I went in on Wednesday to weigh in and I was crushed to learn that after being so careful about eating right, I somehow managed to GAIN 5 lbs!! How the HELL did this happen? I'm trying hard not to let it bother me, chalking it up to possible water retention, but I'm not going to lie, it's discouraging. And for me, one minor setback is enough to make me want to throw in the towel. Trying so hard to let it roll. Hoping to see some better results on Wednesday.

That's it for now. Will be starting supplements on Monday, so we'll see what happens...

In the mean time, if you're local and looking for support, I recommend checking Kim out, www.resultsbykim.com, www.livestrong.com, and www.coolrunnings.com, then click on couch25k.

Time to take my life back

Food and my weight have been a life-long struggle. I grew up in a not-so-hot environment, and would turn to food when I needed comforting. When I was 16, I started the Depo shot. I firmly believe that this along with food for comfort is the one thing that has made it so hard for me to lose weight. In the year that I took that medicine, I gained over 100 lbs. At my peak, I weighed in at 301 lbs. The picture I posted is me at my heaviest. To this day, I still find myself wanting to run to get something to eat when I get excited, sad, upset, angry, depressed, etc. It's like an automated reflex, you just do it without thinking.

A few months ago I gave birth to my 3rd child, and dropped down to 266 lbs., the lowest weight I've been at in more than 5 years. I decided to use that as a starting point to get my life back. I'm tired of not being able to cross my legs, feeling like a slob because no one makes nice clothes for fat people, having no energy, and feeling like my husband is ashamed of me (I know he's not, but I still feel that way). Sometimes I even feel like I can smell myself, rotting away from the inside out, even though I'm meticulous about hygiene.

You may feel like some of this is TMI; and maybe you're right. However, I feel like in order to do something about this, I need to lay everything out there for people to see-so that I can see, just how bad things are so that I know what I need to overcome.

I've had the privilege of watching a friend and her husband make an amazing transformation from being unfit to running races, marathons, and being in the best shape of their lives. Watching them and reading about their journey has been so inspiring that for the first time I feel the motivation to want to make a change in my life. Their attitude is contagious. Before, I'd say "this is it!! this is finally going to be the time that I do something about this" and I'd stick to it...for about 48 hours.

But truly, something is different. I feel different. I feel an urgent need and desire to get in gear and get moving. To take better care of myself and my family. To not only lose weight, but to be healthier. and the momentum has kept up for a few weeks now. And the best part is, I don't feel it going away, I feel a stronger desire than ever to do something about it.

That's basically it in a nutshell. I'll be posting on here the ups and downs of my own personal journey in the hopes that if someone was able to inspire me (a feat I thought wholly impossible), maybe, just maybe I can do the same for someone else someday.