Food and my weight have been a life-long struggle. I grew up in a not-so-hot environment, and would turn to food when I needed comforting. When I was 16, I started the Depo shot. I firmly believe that this along with food for comfort is the one thing that has made it so hard for me to lose weight. In the year that I took that medicine, I gained over 100 lbs. At my peak, I weighed in at 301 lbs. The picture I posted is me at my heaviest. To this day, I still find myself wanting to run to get something to eat when I get excited, sad, upset, angry, depressed, etc. It's like an automated reflex, you just do it without thinking.
A few months ago I gave birth to my 3rd child, and dropped down to 266 lbs., the lowest weight I've been at in more than 5 years. I decided to use that as a starting point to get my life back. I'm tired of not being able to cross my legs, feeling like a slob because no one makes nice clothes for fat people, having no energy, and feeling like my husband is ashamed of me (I know he's not, but I still feel that way). Sometimes I even feel like I can smell myself, rotting away from the inside out, even though I'm meticulous about hygiene.
You may feel like some of this is TMI; and maybe you're right. However, I feel like in order to do something about this, I need to lay everything out there for people to see-so that I can see, just how bad things are so that I know what I need to overcome.
I've had the privilege of watching a friend and her husband make an amazing transformation from being unfit to running races, marathons, and being in the best shape of their lives. Watching them and reading about their journey has been so inspiring that for the first time I feel the motivation to want to make a change in my life. Their attitude is contagious. Before, I'd say "this is it!! this is finally going to be the time that I do something about this" and I'd stick to it...for about 48 hours.
But truly, something is different. I feel different. I feel an urgent need and desire to get in gear and get moving. To take better care of myself and my family. To not only lose weight, but to be healthier. and the momentum has kept up for a few weeks now. And the best part is, I don't feel it going away, I feel a stronger desire than ever to do something about it.
That's basically it in a nutshell. I'll be posting on here the ups and downs of my own personal journey in the hopes that if someone was able to inspire me (a feat I thought wholly impossible), maybe, just maybe I can do the same for someone else someday.
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